First off, right out of the cattle gate, let me just say this: I hope you're offended by the title of my blog. I hope it makes you uncomfortable, self conscious and well aware that your jeans will soon have to be made in a parachute factory if you don't put down that donut and double mocha latte and slap yourself into reality. And, hey- You're breathing heavy- I can hear it. Or is that me?
I'm not here to preach, I'm here to share. Guess what? I'm fat. It's true. No amount of slimmers, tunics, heels or makeup is going to change what I see in my mirror today. And right there in that reflection is Point A. That's where you start to change your life for the better. Point A is where you quit deceiving yourself, where you stop sucking your gut in hoping it will stay stuck forever and where you finally agree that it's time - that you won't spend another day in blinders. Point A is when you see yourself without filters.
Get naked. Turn around. Sideways now. Forward. Back. Front.
Hey, don't cry. It's just good that we caught it before it inflates any further, before it causes health problems and embarrassing moments at the beach and keeps you from every fun photo on Facebook.
So, right now go weight yourself. Yes, now. While you're naked. This way you're not tempted to estimate the weight of your sweats, tee shirts and socks as 6.2 pounds. Believe me, I've done that. I've lied to myself for years now. Let's not lie, okay? That's rule number One.
Now, after you've squeezed into some clothing, let us take a new notebook out and sit somewhere comfortable. Write across the front: So Long Fatso. This is your food diary. Inside the front cover write the date and your weight. Then write Point B. And then enter weight that you would like to be. (Get it? B is where you want to Be!) This will be your goal weight. You can change Point B later if you think it's necessary. In fact, you will have a bunch of little B's buzzing around. Let's just call these "Bees", shall we? To make our pathetic little notebooks a bit more fun)! You can draw a little bee when you reach Mini goals for 60 days of progress, ten pound milestones and even a little Bee when your jeans go from Jumbo to Giant. And then smaller, and smaller...
What's great about losing weight and eating healthier is that not only does your body change in amazing ways, but your skin does, too. You become more youthful looking, radiant, and happy. A smile is priceless. Even your hair texture will change. And your nails. And eyes. And your outlook on life.
The difficult part about this whole journey is choosing which diet you want to follow. There are so many out there. I'm going to follow a diet that a trainer put me on a few years ago and it was successful for me. (Until I ran over Point B with a massive rolling cheesecake and smothered it in nacho cheese -until I forgot- and became lost- and my eyes were glazed with jelly donuts and denial.
We will discuss exercise and portions and all that stuff as we go. The most important thing is that you know it's time. You've told yourself the truth.
So let's get ready. Tomorrow we begin. Good luck, Fatso!